About Moi

I was born in June 1981, I'm a hearing impaired paper-crafter who loves all things crafty. I sew, although I'm still very much a novice at sewing. I bake and cook hopefully all kinds of delicious treats. I have a huge passion for photography and the camera {yes I'm old school I still use an actual camera} is never far from me. I also love creative writing from making up sentiments/verses for my cards and other paper-craft projects to penning some fiction. I am an avid reader and I may even throw in some book reviews on here too!

Tuesday, 12 July 2016

Christmas in July and what it is like to be a crafty carer

It is Christmas in July over at Ike's world challenges Click here to participate.

I've made two projects this fortnight because I panicked the original design of a 3d tree and angel wasn't enough.

So I've made a tree with a glorious topper angel from Ike's Art and a card using an image I think just conjurs the poem "Twas the night before Christmas".

Whilst I am posting I wanted to ramble a bit.  Most of my readers already know I'm a full time carer and part time help everyone person.  The issue I face a lot is time why I don't make craft more of a priority.  Well it's quite simple, it's important to me especially as it's become a cathartic process especially the art journalling.  I used art journalling long before I had counselling but it was only on my second attempt at counselling that it became clear craft allowed me to express what I couldn't say with words whether through protecting others or through self preservation.  That said there are things of greater priority than my craft sadly.

I have OCD and if there's a mess or something needs cleaning I just cannot concentrate on craft so that must come first.  The other thing is probably the location of where I craft.  I have a desk in the lounge and access is essential, I'm in a corner near the door to the stairs and the front door.  During the week access is constant so it's hard to craft when I invariable need to use the floor to put things on whilst I craft.  Weekends are best for me as there are less people in and out and it enables me to block access to that door and craft for several hours.    At the moment there is also gardening, grass needs cutting, banks need trimming, again I do as much as I can myself and only get help with things like the bank and hedge cutting, although the kind person who does those will assist with grass cutting I just clear up, it still eats into my crafting weekend though.

This makes it look as though I spend all weekend sat on my bottom crafting that's really not true, there's assistance with dressing, washing, meals have to be cooked {add in a complication here where by everything must be made from scratch because I'm seriously allergic to dairy, not just lactose intolerant but very allergic to dairy, it leaves me with severe breathing difficulties and last time I unknowingly had dairy my lungs collapsed}, medication administered, drinks made, given and assisted with, washing up {after all if food is eaten plates, cutlery etc is used}, laundry to do, bathrooms too clean {maybe it's my OCD but a bathroom must be cleaned like a kitchen once a day at least}, kitchen to clean, I always hoover after a weekend of craft to ensure that no bits are left that could become an issue.  Then there's all the other stuff like assisting with eating, eating myself and sometimes just flopping in a chair wondering how it got so late in the day and yet it feels as though absolutely nothing has been achieved.

Of course every day is the same, well with added medical appointments, it's just that for two days a week I try and apply some "me" time too.  I might not have purposefully chosen this and I'm sure most carers say the same it's not about choice, most of us just fall into this without really realising it.  It's not about changing the priority list or order of priority but it is about appreciating what little time I have left in my life for crafting.  Of course I rarely see it as appreciating it but usually as a negative why haven't I more time for craft.

Mostly it's about having someone say "woah it's a bad day", "it's okay there's always tomorrow", "you're doing great today's almost over".  I admit fully I do have one special friend who says all these things and is always there for me when I need someone to just acknowledge it's not as easy as I'd like or as it could be but it's still okay.  I'm very grateful to her for just being her and not trying to change anything but just understanding this is how it is, it's okay for it to be this way and that tomorrow will be totally different but in the same old day in day out way.

I've kind of digressed a bit in my appreciation of this wonderful person {who I won't embarrass by naming but the quotes will give it away if she's unfortunately reading this} but some days I just wish everyone understood or even knew this perspective of how giving your life over to care for someone else can feel overwhelming where there is a pressure to change things or do something else that requires time a carer just doesn't have.  So whilst I'm sure nobody reads this I would just like to implore anyone who does that they please consider what they are saying before they say anything about time and making something more important and thus creating time for it to a carer...life just isn't as simple as not bothering with household chores or not bothering to cook and meeting friends for a liquid meal instead.

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